Tips for parents to respect their children
Case 1: The 13-year-old daughter is a lazy person, and the mess in the small house is always messy.
It was a Saturday. I pushed open the door of my daughter’s room and went in to help her clean.
“Mom, why are you coming in!
“My daughter waved at me unhappy.
”Have you seen how dirty your room is?
“I ignored her protest and picked up my broom.
”Have you seen the ‘Do Not Disturb’ notice on my door?
Don’t just go into my house, okay?
If you want to come in, you should knock!
“” Then clean up the room yourself!
“That’s my business, don’t leave it to you!
“The daughter is still impatient.
”You child, what’s the matter?
“Mom, you should respect me.
I am an adult too!
“I retired angrily from my daughter’s room.
A glance at her daughter’s door really hangs a beautiful pendant, which can be dialed manually, and a corresponding word appears every dial.
For example, “I am reading a book, do not disturb” or “Knock the door before entering the door” and so on.
To make children respect you, you must first respect them.
So how can parents get the respect of their children?
Here are a few “secrets”: Method 1: Consult more and order less.
Someone reminds the child that it is time to do the homework. You can say, “It’s time, should you do your homework?
“Don’t go straight and say:” Don’t watch TV, go homework!
“Please ask the child to do something for the parents. You can say,” Can you bring me that dress for me? ”
“Don’t say” Give me that dress. ”
“If your child does it for you, remember to say” thank you “.
In this way, the child will feel that you respect him, will feel happy, and will be willing to listen to the parents.
Option 2: More guidance and less reprimand.
Parents should treat their children like adults, and don’t always blame him for making a mistake. Instead, they should point out gently to avoid hurting his pride.
If the child’s homework is too messy, parents can say: “You do homework very fast, it’s really good.
However, if I can write the words neatly and beautifully, it would be even better!
I believe if you write carefully, you can do it!
“Parents must not point and point at homework books, angrily:” Look at you, what does this look like?
“Some parents may think so: treat the child as an adult and euphemistically point out the disadvantages?
Can he change?
What child would he call if he had this awareness!
In fact, the more the parent respects his child, the more self-esteem the child will have, and the more self-esteem he will, the more he will pay attention to amending his words and deeds to win the respect of others.
Therefore, it is euphemistic to point out that a child’s shortcomings are more effective than naked reprimand.
Of course, the specific situation has not been dealt with concretely. For the child’s bad behavior, bad habits and other principles, the parents themselves are euphemistic, but they cannot use reprimand, even with his personality on an equal and serious basis, pointing out its harmfulness.Ask them to correct and set some punishment.
This attitude is easier for children to accept than scolding them.
Method three: Make more friends with your children and less peep into your children’s “minorities”.
Many children are particularly disgusted by parents looking at their schoolbags and peeking at their diaries.
The reason why parents do this is to change their understanding of their children’s thoughts and worry about what the child is hiding from their parents, which is conducive to education.
Parents are right, because children need parental education after all.
But isn’t there a better way to understand children?
That is to make more friends with children.
Parents should usually spend more time chatting with their children, asking about their children’s school affairs, interpersonal relationships, opinions on some things, and so on.
If the child tells you some real feelings and thoughts, such as having a good opinion of a male classmate, or a man having a good opinion of her, etc., do not blame her. To understand her first, then tell her what to do.
Parents should patiently give guidance and help to their children about some of their life confusions.
In this way, children recognize that parents respect and trust themselves, and they will increasingly trust their parents, and they will treat their parents as the object of talk, not the object of confidentiality.
Remember: even young children are people who deserve respect!
Please see your child. Case 2 The son is in fifth grade. He usually likes to write and draw. He often writes novels and comics in some books, or some small cartoons in paintings, because his writing is very interesting.The painting technique is also okay. Grandpa, grandma, and grandpa like to discover and appreciate his “masterpiece” when he is fine.
Although we know that his son does not like others to see his “masterpiece”.
But we do want to take a look.
So one time, while he was still awake, my wife and I found his book and was looking at it. I couldn’t think of the son who was suddenly woke up and found him. He was angry: “What are you doing!
Don’t mess with my stuff!
Don’t touch my schoolbag?
“What do you mean, you?
Do you have any secrets?
“Asked his wife.
”It’s no secret.
But this is my personal space, you should respect my exclusive rights!
“We quickly closed the son’s book, only then noticed the words on the cover of the book:” I agree, please do not read it!
“” You should respect me.
I am an adult too!
“You should respect my exclusive rights!”
“Did such blunt confrontational words have your children ever told you, would their words strike your heart like a hammer?
I remember the American psychologist Roda Dunney said: “When parents are wrong, or they violate their promises, if they can say sorry to their children, they can help them build self-esteem, and at the same time, they can cultivate children to follow human habits.
“But we often ignore this, always thinking that he is still a kid, what do you know!
In the subconscious, some parents may think that “he” is my child, and we have the right and responsibility to control everything about him.
As everyone knows, this will almost hinder the child’s growth, and often hurt the child’s self-esteem without knowing it.
If this continues, it will always affect the harmonious relationship between parents and children, and will even cause children to form an imperfect personality.